Parent out there-- how do i properly apologize to my parents?

Well, you could start off by not referring to your mom as a "b*tch". Then, you can do what they have told you to do and sincerely apologize. Apologizing just to get your stuff back will not work; they should see right through that. You could have caused them a LOT of problems by calling and falsely accusing them of abuse. You should be greatful that you have parents that buy you the nice things you are saying were taken from you; they are not required to buy you anything other than necessities. And doing chores is a good thing; it will teach you some responsiblity and to act like a mature teenager, which you are obviously in desperate need of.